Monday, November 19, 2012

closed my eyes

in bed for 19 hours, dreaming of paradise.

woke up to realize i was having a nightmare

Saturday, November 17, 2012

excited for...

the coming new semester.

to be honest, i'm quite surprised with how fast time went by!  can't believe my first university semester is already over.
didn't feel like university at all. probably without seeing the people i use to see every weekday for 5 years just didn't feel right to me.
going in class and sitting with the people i'm more familiar with and seeing the teachers i say 'hi' to in the halls.

i miss that.

now im on a campus that's filled with people. in lecture halls and labs that are bigger and more different than the ones im use to.  sitting anywhere in the room because i don't know any one....

i guess it's time i make changes and try to re-connect with some people.

still surprised by how i'm growing up. to be honest, i really can't imagine how my future will be like. i don't know where i will end up.
it's funny how in the beginning, i use to think i will be at a certain place, working at a certain job and with certain people. now, i don't know any more.
i guess it's because of these uncertainties...i'm really living in the present, not dreaming of the future.

can't wait until my next paycheque.

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

so out of it

so out of it today.  not sure if it's the all nighter i've been having, but i think my wavy personality finally took an effect.
i am lost.

i know it's still too early to know what i want to do. what i need to do.

that's what every says, but i need motivation.
i need something to get me working..and not being the wishy-washy self i am right now.


what is my passion?

anyways, i think i'm really getting use to my job.  considered working three time a week, but not sure how that will go to be honest. i'm worried when i do do three times a week, i can't handle it.

although my depressing phase has gone by,
today, a wave of depression hit me. and after a visit, i realized i'm still sifting through friends. whose there and who isn't.
to me, as i have mentioned in my post way back, talking to me every day isn't the key ingredient to being a best friend.  just know some one has my back means so much more to me.
knowing that when my mind is blank, and i'm being stupid, a name would pop into my head and i will know who i can turn towards.

anyways, time to get to math.
so there will be some prison break time.

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

undecided

stick to iat major minor business?
joint major iat and business?
completely transfer to business major and minor iat?

-sigh-

Sunday, November 4, 2012

Saturday, November 3, 2012

endless new starts

i make mistakes after mistakes...
what makes me different from others is that i am fortunate to have some one forgive me over and over again, letting me start anew each time...thinking it's worth it.
despite all my flaws, i am given countless chances to redeem myself each time.

thank you.

--
today, the eastbound skytrain to king george, which i take every day to get to surrey central, was stopped because a bomb was spotted on the tracks.
news were on it and made me freak out because today, due to the strike, my classes were cancelled.  I was ended up commuting for two and a half hours + back and forth...

although nothing happened, if something were to...i would be freaking out right now.
just two hours before, i was still on the skytrain...if i had stayed to catch breakfast or didn't text my classmate to learn about the class cancellation, i would've been stuck around the surrey area...stuffed into a shuttle bus to get by...

i realized how lucky i was today.
how lucky nothing happened...
the route i take every day...to have something like that happen is actually really scary. how long was it there? this whole time?

either way...i have been way too paranoid these past few days with nightmares. waking up every half an hour when i turn or move...
keep staying up and being awake.
it was due to the halloween horror episode thing i watched with my sister and her boyfriend and andy.
not the best idea...
i thought i matured and grew up, but i guess so did my active imagination..which resulted in my inability to sleep...i now depend on passing out to get some rest..
hopefully this ends soon. brainwashing myself with happy anime at the moment.

anyhow, good news is i figured my schedule for next semester.  very un-art, but i will be only at the burnaby campus.  guess now i can decide which i prefer and also, after the bomb incident, i kind of don't want to keep taking the skytrain. to be honest, the skytrain/bus station is really sketchy...some times i get kind of paranoid when it's getting late.
either way, i will also be able to see if i like business courses. haha. but lucky me, midterms and exams are back again. good bye, midterm projects!