Monday, July 30, 2012


haven't been here since 3 years ago? 3 or 4 years ago.
amazing day. can't believe my tolerance for heights, thrill and just roller coasters is still there.

now that i'm older, i realized my parents were not being cheap, but rather every thing is really over priced.
so glad they didn't let me eat all that cotton candy. after conquering a small regular bag of cotton candy/candy floss, i died.
yeah, if i'm ever a mom, i will not be letting my kids eating that much cotton candy...
though i still adore it ~ just not too much.

didn't get to go on the log slide 'cause it was closed. so bummed.
but dinner was awesome. had dinner down at burnaby after :)

fun day.
visiting sfu surrey campus for the first time ever tomorrow, or in a few hours.

replaying lady gaga's you and i

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Monday, July 23, 2012

will it go by?

a day gone by,
will all the problems go away along with the time?

it is during these hard times when i realize my dad can be pretty wise.
yes, he trolls a lot and bs a lot
but it's the long talks we have outside in the garage as he smokes,
as i sit across from him
when i feel comfortable and feel like i'm we're bonding.

these hard time and problems are what will strengthen us,
he tells me.
make what i think is real actually real.

time for me to fight myself instead of relying.

time to get a job!

dad leaving on friday,
will miss him so much>
time to bond with society again.
time to get my game going.

time to start doing what i said i will set out to do.
first on the list? photography. -- kan&bol adventures :D

domino effect

never really thought that my actions or selfish requests could really do anything.
never did i imagine 2 more hours could do so much and that i would be the cause of something so unfortunate, so awful, so devastating.  never thought i would ruin something to a point where i would cause so much distress and sadness for some one or some people.

after much tears, runny noses and more tears
my dad helped me calm down and think.

did i really do all this? am i really the cause?

despite all the voices saying it wasn't my fault and i can't really do anything; nor should i be scared
i still think so.
ultimately, it was my request, my actions, my idea
that led to all this.
in the end,
i'm still scared. so scared.

scared of any sort of confrontation
scared of the end. a real ending.
scared of future hardships.
scared of what will come next,
whatever comes next.

Friday, July 20, 2012

journey to finding a job

another blog post in a while.

currently on a quest to finding a summer job that will last me for a while.  unfortunately, i have been unsuccessful.
and my failure is kind of causing my papa to nag at me to throw my resumes every where.  he says my tactic sucks and i shouldn't be selectively throwing them (my excuse is to save paper and ink, haha) at only stores with "now hiring" signs, but everywhere and every store.
that's not my style. i want to do it MY WAY! -- reference to adventuretime.

Sunday, July 1, 2012

need to control my emotions

had first driving lessons.
can't believe school (valedictory,prom,and everything) is over.
went job hunting.
watched a film that has been on my list for a while.
took another first.
crashed a friends house.
watched and laughed at sick perv/racist russell peters jokes with two other people.
cried silently once again after a film.

realized i have many more problems than i thought.