you wrote this for me a few years back; after rereading it at the end of 2011 and once more today, i feel...don't really know how to explain.
i don't know if you know, but sometimes, you just write messages to me that help me so much, i'm not sure you really know how much it affects me. even just the novels you lend me or the music you share, they change me so much.
"My Dear Friend" - R. Dominguez
My dear friend,
please don't cry.
I'm here for you,
and that's no lie.
My dear friend,
you can do something amazing with your life.
Please stop ruining yourself,
with that stupid knife.
My dear friend,
things don't always go right.
But I know you're strong,
and you can win this right.
My dear friend,
this road takes us on such a long ride.
But no matter what,
I'll always be by your side.
thank yous.
Ahh so much to say to you so much to tell
ReplyDeleteHaha, but where to start?!
Sometimes you make me so speechless
I'm going to nap
And collect my thoughts
So await my reply, my fair lady! << that's what Rice (haha, get it...?) calls me, fits you well in a dress from queen Victoria's time x-x
Naturally, you'll have an awesome butler ie. Sebastian
Here (: this is my massive spam playlist [ http://db.tt/zwy1i3Rw ] with songs you know as well. Collection of some of my fav songs at the moment. This is good for staring outside on a rainy day (what I realized today during my spare) and hopefully it'll help you as well! Well it's a slightly weird mix of bunch of genres but oh well. Trying to organize an all instrumental counterpart to this *_*
ReplyDelete> http://www.mediafire.com/?qhjmp6r2bwxbxi4 <
Ahh somewhere along the way it seems as if I have forgotten Aya's words..I am glad I took the chance to re-read 1L, already many tears have been collected. I feel ready to live again with a refreshed spirit.
The imagery in this entry really startled me. Its vividness is really frightening..
FALLING OVER
In the past, when I wanted to hurry, I could. Now, even if I want to hurry, I can't. I'm afraid that in the future I may even lose all sense of hurry. Oh God, why did you give me this burden? No, I suppose everyone has some kind of burden. But why is it only me that has to be miserable?
The way I fell over today was really pathetic. When I take a bath, either Mom or Ako helps me take off my clothes in the changing room outside the bathroom. They run some hot water on the floor of the bathroom to warm it for me. Then I crawl across the tiles to get to the bathtub. Today, when I was trying to grab the edge of the bathtub so that I could get into a half-sitting posture, I fell on my bottom. I was unlucky because there was a plastic soap dish right under me. It broke into pieces and fragments got stuck in my buttocks. I cried out in a loud voice.
"What happened?" cried Mom as she flew into the bathroom.
She was very surprised to see a red river of blood mixed with the hot water. She placed a towel firmly on my bottom and then poured a lot of hot water over the parts of me that were still dry. Then Mom and Ako held me. They quickly dried off my body and got me into my pyjamas. Then Mom covered all the cuts on my buttocks with gauze patches.
"With cuts like that," she said, "I think we'd better go to the hospital."
It turned out to be a serious matter. I had to have two stitches at the hospital and didn't get back home till around 9 o'clock. I was so tired.
and yet despite so many episodes similar to that, she got up. She fell and fell and fell and got up again and again and again. That's really something inspiring, isn't it?
One of my favourite quotes from the past few entries I read...
When I told my mom, she started singing, "Forget about the past. If you keep looking back, you won't be able to move forward. Walk three steps forward, then two steps back."